Spirit and I came into each other’s lives when he was 10 _. In a nutshell, he was born in a puppy mill and raised in a situation where, though he was cared for, his needs for love and attention were not really being met. He had lots of health problems, and though his custodial care was good, over the course of his life he had spent lots of time alone, time waiting or time being passed around from caregiver to caregiver because his parents traveled so much. Then, his parents split up in a bitter divorce and he was designated to stay with his mother where he lived for several years in an atmosphere charged with enormous on-going emotional pain.

Then, he came to live with us and many things changed for him. Among the them, he got a doggy door, a fenced-in back yard and he got me. Interestingly enough, about a year prior to meeting Spirit, I had been having visions indicating that a small white dog with a very sweet temperament could be coming into my life. The visions were so real, that I could feel the weight of this dog sitting on my lap. I was at a point in my own journey where I couldn’t imagine how this dog could come into my life and then Spirit showed up.

As soon as I met him, I was head over heels in love with him. We put a lot of attention into getting him the different kinds of medical treatment that he needed to resolve, or at least to minimize, his health issues so that he could have the best quality of life possible …and I poured my love into him.

Over time, it became apparent to me that his heart had been badly broken and that, though he wanted to be able to receive my love, he couldn’t trust me. I had the very strong feeling that he was not able to fully open his heart to me for fear that I, too, would abandon him.

That September session with Chris changed everything. Through Chris, Spirit was able to explain all of what was going on with him and I was able to reassure him that he had found his true mommy now and that, no matter what, I would be there for him and that, even if I were to travel, I would always be coming back to him and he could depend on that. He told me that he truly loved me, that he was relieved that I was so firm in my commitment to him and that he was going to with us for a very long time. A wave of relief passed through me. “Oh good,” I thought, “he’s planning on living until he’s at least 16 or 17 years old.” I was thrilled. In the session, we talked about a number of other things, including the thunder and, when we left, I had a new level of understanding.

The term “BLISS” best describes our next months together. It felt like all barriers to our connection had been cleared away and Spirit and I were living together in blissful love. For me, though I’ve had many animal friends in my life, this was a new level of loving.

Then, in November, Spirit’s first mother came back into his life. He hadn’t seen her in over 3 years, and I could see that he was nervous that I would send him back to live her. Over and over again, I assured him that I was his mother now and that, under no circumstance, would I send him away; he was safe with me. Two weeks later, she came back for another visit and I saw a terrible worry in his eyes as he clung by to me. Again, I reassured him. The truth was, though, that, with his first mother’s return, he had come full circle in his life. His first mother and his daddy had come to a healing and that whole very sad and lonely time of his life was now resolved. Within two weeks, with barely a warning, his body gave out and he crossed over to the other side.

My grief was enormous. Yet, I felt deeply blessed that, thanks to that September session with Chris, Spirit and I had been gifted with those two months of unparalleled bliss. Thus, I could let him go in love with gratitude for his awesome presence in my life. In many ways, we had been healers for each other and, in recognition of that, I could let him go in peace. When we were crying over his body, though, one of things we did tell him was that we would get another dog. We told him that, though we knew we could never replace him, that we love having dog energy around and that when we were finished mourning him, we would invite another four-legged being to come into our lives.

Then a funny thing happened. A few weeks after Spirit died, a friend presented me with the possibility of getting another dog. Suddenly, I went into a panic. Feelings and thoughts sprung up all over the place that Spirit might want to come back. Were these feelings real? Or was I experiencing imaginative delusions inspired by my grief and longing?

I made an appointment with Chris.

Through my tears, I handed her a photo of Spirit and she immediately connected up with him. She told me things that only Spirit would know, so I knew she was talking to him. After he shared what was happening for him, I screwed up my courage and popped the question. Were my feelings that he might be coming back my imagination? Wishful thinking? Or were they real?

I held my breath.

And he said, “Yes, I’m planning to come back, I’m just waiting for the ‘hi sign’ from you.” He proceeded to describe when, how and where he was planning to find me…and I asked him, “Do you want to be named ‘Spirit’ again?” and he said, “No, that was my old name for my old life. That life is over. I want a new name for my new life with you and even though I’m going to be in a new and healthy body, it is going to feel just exactly the same in our hearts.”

So, thank you Chris. And ringing in the back of my mind are the words, “I am going to be with you for a very long time….”